he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
A bitchslap is in order.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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