She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Randomize