I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Randomize