she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Randomize