You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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