Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
You're like the curious george of whores
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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