my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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