Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
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There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
When did angry sex become our thing?
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I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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