Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
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Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
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A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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