My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
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