sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Randomize