After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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