He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
We are two peas in an std pod
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
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