Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
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