I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
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