if i can run in heels then i can drive
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I have grass duct taped all over my body
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize