you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
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