you guys were way drunker than both of me
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
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