WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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