I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I'm too high and old for this...
Randomize