i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize