I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Randomize