Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize