I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
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He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
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Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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