Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises. http://tfl.nu/b9dr
  Replies (14) Good night (542) Bad night (2636) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (810): I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again http://tfl.nu/a301
  Replies (7) Good night (3469) Bad night (1281) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (660): View more from Missouri

  I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (660): I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better. http://tfl.nu/xn35
  Replies (45) Good night (4277) Bad night (1207)
• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (319): We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world. http://tfl.nu/rh6u
  Replies (12) Good night (2663) Bad night (1428)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (515): He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend. http://tfl.nu/m6dn
  Replies (10) Good night (2802) Bad night (643)
• Favorite

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (225): Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it http://tfl.nu/wgow
  Replies (8) Good night (1049) Bad night (671) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month. http://tfl.nu/gp1m
  Replies (18) Good night (766) Bad night (4322) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets. http://tfl.nu/3ocj
  Replies (12) Good night (714) Bad night (1612) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.

  (1-520): View more from Arizona

  I can pencil you in at 3:30

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (520): Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk. (1-520): I can pencil you in at 3:30 http://tfl.nu/ztyv
  Replies (8) Good night (2863) Bad night (791) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers" http://tfl.nu/5du2
  Replies (2) Good night (934) Bad night (309) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (416): I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison. http://tfl.nu/ptp6
  Replies (1) Good night (1050) Bad night (238) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie http://tfl.nu/t5j0
  Replies (2) Good night (185) Bad night (842) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (905): Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk. http://tfl.nu/f6av
  Replies (3) Good night (573) Bad night (194) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B. http://tfl.nu/1rlu
  Replies (8) Good night (414) Bad night (480) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (320): View more from Minnesota

  Were you drinking last night?

  (320): View more from Minnesota

  Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (320): Were you drinking last night? (320): Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety. http://tfl.nu/r4i0
  Replies (3) Good night (544) Bad night (141)

Randomize