Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
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