drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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