apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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