We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize