you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Randomize