Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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