Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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