I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize