that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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