I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Houston, we have a blender
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize