Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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