you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
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i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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