What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
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