i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
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I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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