Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize