this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
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