ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Your mouth is God's brothel.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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