So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Sext me about skeletons
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize