Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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