Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"

(586): View more from Michigan

and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."

(586): View more from Michigan

I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.

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(586): love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t" (586): and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps." (586): I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me. http://tfl.nu/cqw0

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(917): View more from New York City

as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.

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(917): as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on. http://tfl.nu/1170

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(609): View more from New Jersey

Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?

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(609): Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do? http://tfl.nu/p111

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(845): View more from New York

It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.

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(845): It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time. http://tfl.nu/ka3h

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(760): View more from California

What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?

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(760): What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch? http://tfl.nu/c2lm

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(843): View more from South Carolina

He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.

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(843): He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat. http://tfl.nu/b45i

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(810): View more from Michigan

She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.

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(810): She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance. http://tfl.nu/vgvp

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(248): View more from Michigan

She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.

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(248): She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds. http://tfl.nu/bean

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.

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(978): I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now. http://tfl.nu/xddc

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(615): View more from Tennessee

They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.

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(615): They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this. http://tfl.nu/rcac

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(913): View more from Kansas

you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.

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(913): you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro. http://tfl.nu/rmdo

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(619): View more from California

He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.

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(619): He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me. http://tfl.nu/6dyk

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(905): View more from Ontario

It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on

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(905): It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on http://tfl.nu/h715

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(315): View more from New York

I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night

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(315): I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night http://tfl.nu/ggh6

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(940): View more from Texas

P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.

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(940): P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message. http://tfl.nu/r5mr

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