why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
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