Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
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