Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
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