Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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