The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
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